Middle school is the middle of physical and social change for young people, and it is easy to feel lonely and left out. But at the recent Diocese of Virginia Middle School Weekend, dozens of middle school students from across the Episcopal Diocese of Virginia made personal connections with God and each other.
The April retreat at Shrine Mont, A Time to Build: My Spiritual Identity, Faith and Friendships, created space and opportunities for worship, small-group discussions, games, and music, along with hiking and other activities on the mountain.
Some students connected with the combination of physical activity, including clapping, singing, and being outdoors, and the psychological safety of smaller groups who encouraged speaking freely without being judged.
“When we go into small groups, it’s really nice, and it’s helpful, because we get to talk about stuff, and no one will say anything about what you say,” one participant said in an interview with the Rev. Ricardo Sheppard, canon for discipleship for the Episcopal Diocese of Virginia.
“I like all the songs,” another participant added. “I sing because they make me feel really connected to God, just like all the happiness and clapping and singing makes me feel really close to everyone around me.”
“I really do think we’re learning about God in a great way,” another said. “Like how you learn about he’s like a part of you. He’s like a part of the sad and the happy.”
Other Retreat Voices
At the retreat, sixth- through eighth-grade students in the Diocese of Virginia, along with some not connected to an Episcopal parish, reflected on who they are and how faith and relationships help shape them. Their retreat theme drew from Ecclesiastes chapter 3, which describes God’s rhythms for every human experience, from birth to death.
“We’re gathered with our middle school and high school students, having an opportunity to come together to build relationships, but even greater still, to talk about the goodness of God,” Sheppard said at the retreat. “We are sharing and learning about faith and what faith means.”
The half-dozen students interviewed about their retreat experience mentioned spiritual growth and social breakthroughs. Some students who identified as shy felt they were able to successfully reach out at the retreat. Youth from individual parishes left with a bigger picture of the wider diocesan community.
- “It’s okay if there’s like bad things happening to you, like it’s all a part of God’s plan, and it’s supposed to happen and bad things occur, so that you can grow from it.”
- “The retreat helps you learn about how it’s okay to make mistakes, because God will always be with you and he planned for it, and there’s normally a good outcome at the end.”
- “You should make new friends and not just stick to your church.”
Because the youth retreat coincided with a work weekend at Shrine Mont, “a really awesome grace happened,” said Morgan Miller, a retreat chaperone for Grace Episcopal Church and parent of a participant.
“Our youth could see the adults and their faith in action, and I saw that start to percolate down into their brains: OK, at the same time that I’m exploring who I am, I’m seeing older youth and adults doing the same thing, acting out that faith.”
Strengthening Youth Ties
The retreat reflects a broader diocesan effort to rebuild and strengthen youth community and leadership following disruptions caused by the pandemic.
Middle school is not too young to think about big questions like leading others like Jesus did. Sheppard recalled sitting in on a discussion with high school students where this topic came up.
“The words that came back were compassion, kindness, grace and leading from the front,” he said. “Hearing them was impactful and a reminder that our youth have a strong understanding of God.”
“Middle school students are meeting new friends, but they, too, are beginning to ask big questions: Who is Jesus? What did Jesus do? Why is faith important? And why is it important not only to have faith but to go forward and live it out?”
The diocese renewed diocesan youth leadership and programming last year at Shrine Mont after a hiatus of several years following the pandemic. Before the interruption, awareness was often passed down informally among young people.
Looking ahead, planners for the 232nd Annual Convention of the Diocese of Virginia, scheduled for Nov. 5-7 in Fredericksburg, have set an ambitious goal: securing a youth delegate, age 21 or younger, from each of the diocese’s 16 regions.
Youth delegates will attend Annual Convention as ex officio members and each will have one vote. The experience will be tailored specifically to them, including an orientation designed to meet their needs, full participation in convention activities, a Friday-night reception with other youth delegates, reserved lunch tables, and a workshop session focused on their interests, including time with one of the Diocese of Virginia bishops.
Ideas for Future Youth Retreats
By bringing together middle schoolers, future church leaders, the April retreat encouraged early formation in peer leadership, belonging, and spiritual growth. Also on hand were high school students serving as parish youth leaders, who acted as mentors, leaders, and role models throughout the weekend.
Sue Cromer, director of children, youth and family ministry at St. Peter’s Episcopal Church in Arlington, said that she hopes to see even more youth leadership in future gatherings.
“Adults stepped in to make sure this event came together, but I’d love to hear more youth voices and have them be the force driving everything,” she said.
Middle schoolers offered these ideas for future youth events:
- “Maybe more bonding stuff.”
- “I’d like to see more outdoor activities so we can get some fresh air and have more bonding activities so you get to know some of the people.”
- “Going to the pool. That would be nice.”
- “Camping, or having more games.”
- “We bring a lunch up to the cross.”
Morgan, the chaperone and parent, suggested setting dates and plans at least six months in advance to help more leaders and youth attend, so more young people can experience the opportunity for spiritual formation that helps them go back into the world as God’s hands and feet.
Middle School Weekend 2027 is scheduled April 16 – 18 at Shrine Mont.
Sheppard called the 2026 retreat “the beginning of what I hope will happen not only yearly, but regionally, bringing middle school, high school and younger children together, and eventually gathering families. We grow together. We never separate.”